The Lilypad (3)

We’re all Toxic to Someone

As a heart-centered entrepreneur, I’m surrounded by many people who are devout believers of Law of Attraction and manifesting principles. And something that comes up over and over again in these circles?

Toxic people.

How to deal with them, what to do with them, and can someone please teach how to get rid them?

This never set well with me. How can someone be “toxic”? It’s not like human beings contain venom and can inject it into someone, poisoning them with their toxicity.

And the whole “so-and-so drains my energy” bit? Didn’t sit well either.

I firmly believe that we are all connected, all part of the same great big spirit, and you are me and I am you on a soul level. So, how can I say another part of me at my essence (the soul level) is toxic?

I can’t.

Are there people moving through their own forgiveness lessons at their own pace? YES!

Those people? They get chalked up as negative people or toxic people when really they are just going through own lessons at their own speed.

And if that’s the case—that we each go through our own forgiveness lessons at our own speed—then we are ALL toxic people to someone.

What does this mean for you?

Ultimately, people who “drain” your energy or leave a negative cloud around you didn’t do either of those things.

YOU did.

YOU decided.

YOU shifted your mindset to one that categorized that particular person as negative even though they did nothing other than trigger a forgiveness lesson in you.

When you are the force behind whether or not someone you encounter is toxic, it all comes down to your perception.  How you perceive someone will directly influence your thinking and your behavior towards them and yourself.  And the beauty of all your interactions being based on your perception?

You can change it.

What can I do when I do encounter someone I perceive as toxic?

I challenge you to really look at those “toxic” people in your life and ask yourself:

Would I say this of myself?
What is this person bringing up for me (ie. what do I associate this person with)?
What do I need to forgive?

Unearthing the answers to these questions can help you shift your perception of the person you labeled as toxic and the situation you find yourself in that’s causing you distress.  And once you have dug up the root cause of why you are choosing this perception of toxicity, you can change it to one of love and acceptance.

You could even come to like the person.  Want to be around them.  Enjoy their company.

Remember most of all: you are “toxic” to someone else who is on their own journey.

How would you want them to treat you?


Ready to change your perception, dig up your dark bits, and learn to see people as people (instead of some toxic entity)?  Let’s chat.